by Laine Towell, Psy.D.
For elementary-aged children, parents and caregivers are juggling a lot. Dropoffs, laundry, homework, extracurriculars, grocery shopping, making lunches…the list goes on and on. On top of all of this, we worry about our children. Are they happy? Are they making friends? Are they doing well in school? When our kids are struggling, we want to fix it (or, better yet, help them fix it). Sometimes, a question comes up about a child’s attention, impulse control, or activity level. Caregivers or teachers may wonder if a child has Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, otherwise known as ADHD. But how can you tell if the symptoms are ADHD, or just a “kid being a kid”?
We know that, if ADHD is present, it’s important to identify and treat it. Untreated ADHD significantly increases a child’s risk for academic and behavioral challenges, as well as social-emotional and behavioral difficulties. With that said, lots of kids are active and sometimes inattentive, and many of those kids do not have ADHD. So how does a caregiver know when to seek evaluation for ADHD? Let’s talk about a few things to consider.
Your child is struggling at school
Is your child having a hard time getting their work done at school? Has their teacher raised concerns for your child seeming disengaged in class, not handing in work, or struggling to focus on lessons? Is your child having a hard time staying seated during circle time, instruction time, or independent work? Do you have concerns your child is falling behind academically, despite seemingly being able to do the work? Your child’s teacher is a great resource to get some information on how they are doing, and what concerns they may have. They are also experienced in what behaviors are developmentally appropriate for your child’s age.
Your child is not able to get through daily tasks at home
Is it a constant battle for your child to brush their teeth or do their homework? Do you feel like you are repeating yourself over and over again? Is your child struggling to sit through a short meal, constantly interrupting you, or running around like a motor is driving them? While all kids will sometimes get sidetracked or excited (especially younger ones), keep an eye on if these things are starting to disrupt your family life. If you have trouble leaving the house, or if you and/or your child are feeling constantly frustrated, it’s a good time to seek help.
Your child is having a hard time with peers
Does your child often “bowl over” their friends? Can they get very excited and accidentally hurt another child, or get frustrated and upset and hit or kick? Do you worry your child is sometimes “too much” for friends, despite being friendly and interested in peers? Consider these questions in context with other behaviors.
Your child is having a hard time regulating themselves
Keep in mind that, for young ones especially, children often need support to regulate themselves. In other words, we don’t expect young children to be able to consistently regulate their responses to disappointment or frustration successfully. Very young children are known for their difficulty self-regulating, and that’s normal! With that said, notice if your elementary-aged child is very frequently going from “0 to 100.” Do they become highly upset (e.g., yelling, sobbing, becoming verbally or physically aggressive) in response to seemingly small things? Do they have a hard time controlling their responses, then are regretful later, or say they don’t know what happened? This is also helpful information when considering how to help your child.
If some of these situations sound familiar to you, consider reaching out to your child’s pediatrician, or to us to consider an evaluation to diagnose or rule out ADHD. We are happy to meet with you and discuss if further evaluation is warranted. You are your child’s best advocate and support!